crapfest

I got back to London on Friday, after spending ten days in Houston with my parents, and I got one hell of a return present courtesy of my shitty window lock and the absolute lack of security in my hall.

Basically my laptop was stolen from my room while I was eating dinner. In less than 50 minutes, someone had prised open my window (which faces the street), reached in and yanked my laptop through the bars and made off with it.

It was such a huge shock to come back and find my window open and my laptop gone. I know it's just a laptop, and there wasn't any particularly sensitive information on it, but it still has me freaked out about being in my room alone and I had to take a sleeping pill last night to get myself to calm down, finally.

Apparently the hall has insurance for all its residents, but I won't know the details till Monday. I've changed all my online passwords, cancelled any credit/debit card I used online, filed a police report and had them dust for fingerprints... I've done everything right and I suppose I just have to move on now and not think about it too much. My parents have been wonderful, telling me not to worry, it's just money and I should be happy nothing happened to hurt me. I'm really glad all my friends are back in London too, they've helped me so much.

I'm really in kind of shock still, because I have 4 essays due in two weeks, exams starting in 4 weeks, and a hell of a lot of work to do for my dissertation. Most of my work so on my laptop was outlines and random ideas that had come to me for my work, and so I had not backed that up. I usually only back up references and further reading and actual drafts of essays. But because I don't have those pointers with me anymore, I don't know where to start.

And more than that, I just feel... very dazed and hopeless about my future. I know it was just a laptop, but it helped keep me sane and stop the voices in my head whenever I start to doubt myself.

I've lost all of my old pictures, the ones I never uploaded. Also lost all the of fan fic and writing that I've done over the years.

I need to do several things: sleep, most importantly. And shower. And tomorrow I'm going to go to Waterstones to spend some book vouchers that I have to cheer myself up, and have something in the room to distract me.

I really just want to get through these last few months at LSE.